The Death of Addie Gray Read online

  “This is ridiculous,” I say with a sigh, taking a step back. “Rob, please -”

  “So hard,” he reads from the page, “that in one case, the victim had to go to hospital for stitches.” He turns to me. “Does that sound like anyone we know?”

  “What are you suggesting?” I ask. “That Addie's copying some long-dead serial-killing girl from Iowa?”

  “Ohio,” he corrects me.

  “Or that she's possessed by the spirit of the same girl?”

  “I'm saying that there are too many coincidences here!”

  “Coincidences happen,” I point out. “They happen all the time. Jesophat's not the weirdest made-up name, and she's far from the first little girl to ever bite a friend.” I wait for him to reply, but he seems to truly believe that he's onto something. “This doesn't prove a goddamn thing,” I add finally, “and you know it. You've just got a name, and that's it.”

  “Two names.”

  “It doesn't prove anything!”

  “But maybe this will,” he replies, getting to his feet and heading through to the hallway.

  “Where are you going?” I ask, before sighing as I head after him. Spotting him ahead, I see that he's pushing open the door to Addie's room. “Stop!” I hiss. “We just got her to sleep!”

  “Addie,” he whispers. “Addie, can you hear me?”

  Reaching the door, I lean through and see that Addie still hasn't responded. She's on the bed with her back to us, and she appears to be fast asleep.

  “Addie?” Rob says again.

  “Just let her rest,” I tell him, reaching out to pull the door shut.

  “What's wrong? Scared?”

  “Of course I'm not scared,” I whisper. “I just don't want you disturbing our daughter like this!”

  “Wait a moment,” he replies, before pausing for a few seconds. “Serriah?”

  Addie immediately turns, staring at us with shocked eyes.

  We stand in silence for a moment, but she simply watches us for a couple more seconds before slowly rolling over and turning her back to us once again.

  Rob pulls the door shut.

  “That doesn't prove anything,” I tell him, although my heart is pounding in my chest. “You just startled her, that's all.”

  “When's her appointment with that psychologist?”

  “Tomorrow. He managed to fit her in at ten.”

  “Then maybe he can explain it,” he continues, “because right now, Addie is freaking me the fuck out.”

  Erica

  “It's a farm,” Addie whispers, sitting with her eyes closed. Suddenly a smile flashes across her face, broader and more genuine than any other I've seen from her since she woke up. “There's nothing else for miles and miles around. It's like Heaven. Heaven right here all around us. Just fields, most of them for crops but some...”

  Her voice trails off for a few seconds, and I can see that her eyes are twitching behind the lids.

  “Some of the fields are left empty each year,” she continues, “so the soil can recover. That's really vital. I was told that once, back when Pa thought it was important to teach one of us about the land. He always said it was Joe he was teaching, and that I was just allowed to tag along, but I knew the truth. Joe was always an idiot, and Pa knew he'd never have what it took to take over the farm. So letting me listen in during the lessons... That was just Pa's way of teaching me things, without having to admit that he needed to. I don't think he really thought a girl should take over the farm ever. But I could have, if...”

  She pauses.

  “Well, if things had gone differently. I would've taken it over and run it better, and made it even bigger. I had all these plans, see? I used to daydream about what I'd do when I was in charge. But Pa got so angry with me later on, I knew he'd changed his mind.”

  Doctor Sawyer makes a few notes, before glancing at me briefly. Turning back to Addie, he seems momentarily lost for words.

  “Tell me about the other people on the farm,” he says calmly, as if he's worried that he might accidentally wake Addie from her hypnotic trance. “You mentioned Pa and Joe. Is there anyone else?”

  She shakes her head.

  “What about your mother?”

  “She's dead.”

  I feel a shiver pass through my chest. I want to reach out and take her hand, to tell her I'm right here, but Doctor Sawyer was very adamant when he said I mustn't interfere. I know that if I try to interrupt, he'll just make me wait outside.

  “How did your mother die, Addie?”

  We wait, but she doesn't reply.

  “I'm sorry,” he continues, “I mean... Serriah. How did your mother die, Serriah?”

  “Childbirth.”

  “Giving birth to you?”

  She nods. “Sometimes I think she's still here. I hear noises at night.”

  “What kind of noises?”

  “Sobbing.”

  “And you think this is your dead mother?”

  “I know it sounds crazy,” she continues, “but it's definitely a woman. I think Ma never really left the farm, not properly. I can understand that. Her spirit's tied to the place, it's no more complicated than that. Maybe she's tied to me, too. Maybe she's sad because of how Joe beats me.”

  “Your brother beats you?”

  She nods again. “Sometimes I deserve it. Sometimes I don't. He's an idiot. Not like simple, just dumb. He's got no discipline, either. I always thought he'd cause trouble when I took over the farm. I figured I'd just have to find him an easy job to do, one where it didn't matter whether he actually did it, and give him enough money to get drunk. The way I see it, with some people it's just not worth wasting your time trying to save them from themselves. Just corner them off so they can't cause too much damage to anyone else. Joe's a dumb retard anyway.”

  “We didn't teach her bad words like that,” I whisper. “I swear.”

  Doctor Sawyer raises a hand to remind me I mustn't speak.

  “Go on, Serriah,” he continues.

  Addie's lips twitch slightly, but no words come out. It's almost as if, by interrupting and saying a few words, I've drawn her out of her fantasy world.

  “Tell me about Jesophat,” Doctor Sawyer says after a moment. “Where does Jesophat live?”

  “Next farm along,” she replies with a big grin, suddenly seeming much more enthusiastic. “About fifteen miles away. One day, we're gonna put our two farms together and make one really big one, or...” She frowns. “That was the plan. We talked about it all the time. We've got it all planned out. We've picked out a name for it, and we know exactly which fields we're gonna use for which crops, and how to rotate them, and where to put the animals, and everything!”

  “And you're friends with Jesophat?”

  She nods. “More than friends.”

  “How long have you known him?”

  “A long time. Since we were children, although...” She pauses, and after a moment I realize that she's blushing. “We've gotten to know each other better over the past couple of years.”

  “This is ridiculous,” I mutter under my breath.

  “And how does your father feel about that, Serriah?”

  We wait, but Addie remains silent for a moment.

  “Serriah? How does your father feel about the fact that you spend time with Jesophat?”

  “He doesn't understand,” she replies with a trace of bitterness in her voice. “He and Jesophat's Pa hate each other, and they want us to be the same, but we can't on account of the fact that we're in love! It was love at first sight, and it's gonna be love 'til last sight too! Always and forever! They keep trying to force us apart, but they can't 'cause...” She pauses, clearly a little breathless. “Well, they can't 'cause it's just how things are gonna be. They should've accepted that, they should've opened their minds to our love, but instead they shut themselves all closed off and...” She pauses again, and this time a tear runs down her cheek. “They never understood our love. They were too stupid. Their ignorant l
ittle minds couldn't handle it, and that's why...”

  Another pause, and then slowly she sits up straight in the chair, while keeping her eyes tight shut.

  “And that's why things ended up the way they did,” she continues. “It wasn't our fault. It was theirs, for going against our love. They pushed us too far.”

  ***

  “She really believes all of this,” Doctor Sawyer says a short while later, as I sit in his office with Addie waiting outside. “She's managed to create, or ingest, a very detailed fantasy world. If I might say so, some of the ideas she's incorporated into that world seem... a little unusual for someone so young. In her head, she's pretending to be a girl six or seven years older than her actual age.”

  “What she said about that Jesophat boy,” I reply, my voice still trembling with shock. “I mean, how did she... She shouldn't have been able to even imagine half of that. We've always raised her well.”

  “I'm sure you have.”

  “She shouldn't know those words.”

  “I'm absolutely -”

  “Or some of those ideas,” I add, feeling increasingly desperate. “To hear my daughter saying that kind of thing...”

  My voice trails off, and for a moment I feel as if I'm about to burst into tears.

  “I don't doubt you for a moment,” Doctor Sawyer continues, “but children have a way of learning more about the world than their parents intend. An overheard conversation, an unattended laptop, an unlocked phone... All of these things can be portals for children to get glimpses of things they don't quite understand. Then their fertile imaginations make up the rest.”

  “Still, it was...” I feel another shudder pass through my chest. “It was disgusting. Revolting...”

  “And you say that some of the details she mentioned are rooted in historical fact?”

  “My husband did a little research,” I continue. “The whole thing with Serriah Sansome and Jesophat O'Reilly really happened. But I swear, I don't know how she could have heard about it.”

  “She was in a coma for nine months,” he replies. “I'm sure she heard a lot that you're not aware of.”

  “But -”

  “You weren't with her twenty-four hours a day,” he continues. “What if two nurses happened to be talking about Serriah and Jesophat? What if a cleaning lady had the radio on while she worked in Addie's room, and by some chance there happened to be a program about the murders?”

  “That seems unlikely,” I point out.

  “But it's possible.” He pauses for a moment, as if he's lost in thought. “She might very well have been in a very impressionable state. If someone had happened to be watching an episode of Star Trek in the next room, perhaps we'd be sitting here now trying to understand why Addie keeps talking about alien worlds and spaceships. The point is, we understand very little about how the conscious mind works and even less about the subconscious mind. Ruling out the more far-fetched ideas, it's quite clear to me that somehow Addie did hear the lurid detail of those murders, and now she's folded them into her own trauma so she can regurgitate them.”

  “How do we stop it?”

  “I think time is our best ally,” he continues. “The fantasy will fade, and you'll start to see the real Addie emerging again.”

  “But you can't be sure of that.”

  “She can't sustain this level of delusion forever. Her real personality will break through in a matter of days or weeks. Until then, you have to be very careful and make sure you don't inadvertently feed into her fantasy world. I'm afraid that includes contradicting her. The more you tell her it's nonsense, the more she might retreat into the illusion. When she references the story of Serriah and Jesophat, you must simply smile and move on, or better yet change the subject. Whatever you do, you mustn't put her on the defensive. I'm afraid that would simply lengthen the period of time it takes for her to shake this off.”

  “And are we supposed to call her Serriah instead of Addie?”

  He shakes his head. “It should be easy enough to avoid using her name at all. For all the reasons I've just outlined.”

  Sighing, I try to imagine how Rob and I are going to get through the next few days.

  “I sympathize with you,” Doctor Sawyer continues. “This is one of the most extreme cases I've ever seen, but that doesn't mean it's hopeless. I'm confident that when you come back to see me in a week's time, there'll already be signs of progress.”

  ***

  “Did I say anything bad in there?” Addie asks a short while later, as we sit in the car outside.

  “Bad?” Turning to her, I see that she's frowning. “No, honey. You didn't say anything bad.”

  “I don't remember talking to that man,” she continues. “I thought it wasn't real. Hypnotizing people, I mean, but... He really put me to sleep. Did I talk a lot?”

  “You said a few things.”

  “Like what?”

  “Never mind.”

  “Did I upset you?”

  I shake my head. “No, sweetheart, you didn't upset me.”

  “Are you sure? When you came back from the bathroom just now, it looked like you'd been crying.”

  “Absolutely not,” I reply, which is a lie. I thought I'd hidden it better. “Do you want to stop on the way home and get an ice cream?” I ask, hoping to get us onto a slightly happier subject. “Remember that store you used to like in the mall?”

  She pauses, and for a moment it seems as if she doesn't quite understand the question.

  “I think I'd rather go home,” she says finally.

  “Home?”

  “The house. Can we go back there? There are some things I want to do.”

  “Sure,” I reply, starting the engine and feeling as if maybe we've made a small breakthrough. I know Doctor Sawyer said I shouldn't push her, but I can't help myself. “We can go home, but first... I want to show you something that I think you might remember.”

  Erica

  “It's huge,” Addie says, her eyes as big as dinner-plates as I lead her by the hand across the threshold. “It's... It's like something from space!”

  “It's just a mall,” I reply, relieved to see that the place is pretty busy. There are plenty of people, and scores of shops and restaurants on several floors. This might not be the largest mall in America, but it always has a fun atmosphere. I remember coming here with my friends as a kid, and over the past few years I've enjoyed bringing Addie, although lately my trips have been limited to late-night runs to pick up take-out food. This time, though, everything's different.

  Turning to her, I can't help wondering if I might shock her into remembering the good times.

  “Can we go now?” she asks.

  “We only just got here,” I point out with a smile.

  I try to lead her further across the food court, but she holds back.

  “What's wrong, honey? You're not scared, are you?”

  Even as those words leave my mouth, I can see the answer in her eyes. She's not just scared, she's terrified, and she looks as if she's on the verge of tears. After a moment, however, she seems to spot something nearby, and she frowns.

  Following her gaze, I see two teenagers sitting on a bench. To say that they're kissing would be an understatement. In fact, it almost looks like they're trying to eat each other's faces.

  “Maybe you shouldn't look at that,” I say, turning to Addie. “Why don't we get an ice cream?”

  This time, she lets me lead her toward the ice cream counter, although she's still looking around with a sense of awe. I keep waiting for her to remember the many, many times we've been here before, but so far she just seems dazed. I'm starting to think that maybe I should have followed Doctor Sawyer's advice a little more closely and taken her straight home.

  Before I have time to reconsider my plan, however, I spot one of the staff from Aladdin's Pizza wandering past, heading toward the escalator. We briefly make eye contact, and I can see that he's surprised to see me here during the day. After a moment he looks at Ad
die, and he's so shocked that he almost walks straight into one of the information boards.

  I can't help but smile. I guess he had me pegged as some kind of loser, but now he sees that I have a little family all of my own.

  “Is chocolate chip still your favorite flavor?” I ask, turning back to Addie.

  She pauses, and then she looks at the ice cream counter. Again, she seems shocked, as if she's never before seen such a vast range of choice.

  “Mommy, Mommy!” she used to shout excitedly, before her accident. “Can I have chocolate chip, strawberry and the green one?”

  “Only two,” I almost always told her back then. “That's the rule!”

  “I know we usually have a two scoop rule,” I say, feeling as if I want to treat her, “but maybe today we can be naughty and get three. Does that sound good?”

  I wait for an answer, but she's gripping my hand tighter and tighter. A moment later, a screen over by the video game store lights up and plays some kind of trailer, and Addie turns as if she's startled.

  “That's just for a game,” I tell her, as the screen shows a first-person shooter. “Come on, choose your scoops or I'll do it for you.”

  Before she can answer, a couple of teenaged girls run past shouting and yelling. Addie watches them for a moment, and then she looks back at the video game screen.

  “I'm sorry,” I tell the man behind the counter, “we'll be with you in a moment.”

  “Take your time,” he says with a smile.

  “Honey?” I look down at Addie and see that she still seems terrified, as if the noise and clamor of the mall is too much for her. “Okay,” I continue, figuring that I've pushed her too far, “maybe we should -”

  “Gross!” a girl says nearby.

  I turn and see that several people are watching Addie, and they all seem horrified. Looking back down at my daughter, it takes a moment before I see the puddle forming between her feet.